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Kevling's Advice
#6. Phone advice
Never, I repeat NEVER, lean over a mop bucket half full of dirty water with your mobile phone in your shirt pocket.
It will end in tears.
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#5. Card (iac Arrest)
Next time you're in Sainsbury's, and you think you're being:-
(a) really really clever
(b) "with it"
(c) in control
(d) oh-so-knowledgable
(e) all of the above
by inserting your bank card into the chip & pin terminal yourself...
It's always a good idea to... take it out again afterwards.
Especially when you don't realise until the next day, when you're about to draw some money out for a lunchtime pint with a friend.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Luckily, I had just enough cash on me for some lunch and a beverage, and Sainsbury's had actually noticed and stashed it away for me...
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#4 Cars (Again)
If you happen to finish work at, say, 12ish, and don't go out in your
car until, say, 7ish, it's probably not a good idea to accidentally
leave the interior light on.
It was fine when we went out at 7, but when we stopped at the chippy on the way back... would it start? would it heck-as-like.
Thankfully, a certain Mr Verbal was on-call with a set of jumpleads.
What a star...
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#3 Dogs
(1) When you take your two dogs for a walk late at night, make sure
both of them actually come into the back garden with you when you get
back home*.
(2) And then when you get to the back door, do a double check to make sure you haven't shut one out*
(3) If you ignore those first two points, you may, just may, find
that your back gate has a massive hole in it where your abandoned dog
has clawed it's way through from outside.
(4) You may also find that the front door and back door frames are
really really scratched up, and that there are muddy pawprints over
both doors and the whole garden fence.
(5) Finally, DO NOT BLOG ABOUT IT, unless someone reports you to the RSPCA
* In my defence, I would like to say that both our dogs are
infamous for skulking behind you, and sneaking through the door / gate
behind you as you turn to close it.
PS She is absolutely fine by the way.
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#2 Sandwiches
.. if you get the urge to make one of your infamous triple-decker toast double fried egg and brown sauce sandwich, it's not a good idea to do it two thirds of the way through growing a comedy charity tache.
I need a wash.
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#1 Cars
If the gap between the parked cars, and the double-parked milkfloat looks too small to fit through...
It probably is.
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